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7 Steps to Surviving Separation.
The relationship didn't last but you have one or more beautiful children together. How do you successfully separate and co-parent when it's tough to even speak nicely to each other? You'd prefer to never lay eyes on your ex-partner EVER again! But those kids need two parents who are coping well with life (and each other) so what do you do???? 1. Give yourself permission to grieve the loss and changed circumstances With any change (even welcome change) grief may be present. Ta

Carolyn the Counsellor
Nov 17, 20194 min read
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Processing loss after relationship breakdown...
You try everything you can think of. Try to prove yourself, impress or lure them back. Thought about them endlessly. It has taken over your mind and you are feeling less secure and more needy every day. Maybe you've cut this person out of your life before. But back you go again, seeking their approval, their comfort and their focus. Even if it feels negative at times, or that you're not welcome or even valued by them..... without them though, life feels miserable, unbearable

Carolyn the Counsellor
Oct 10, 20193 min read
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You can't choose your family...
They take little swipes at you and are "just joking". Insist you do things their way, as YOUR WAY isn't good enough. Are openly critical and never fail to remember in detail some error you made 14 yrs ago.... It's starting to feel like an endless pattern of disrespect, but it's the only family you have. So what can you do?? Family members can be fantastic. Wise and patient. Full of acceptance of flaws and imperfections. You've seen them out there in the world - your friends

Carolyn the Counsellor
Jul 27, 20195 min read
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Six Ways to Help Teens Build Self-Compassion.
"I'm a failure." "I always say the wrong thing." "I'm the ugly one in the group." "Everything I do turns to rubbish." Negative thoughts like these are common for some adolescents. The thoughts can cycle around and around - relentless, harsh and judgmental. Do you hold yourself to unrealistic standards? Beat yourself up emotionally? Feel like your own worst critic? You're not alone. Here are some (life-changing) techniques that help reprogram the way you view yourself: 1. Move

Carolyn the Counsellor
Jul 5, 20194 min read
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Getting Things Done - a Game-Changer
Work smarter (not harder) to achieve anything your heart desires. Some tips for getting started... Why Plan? A plan gives you a personally created (and therefore brilliant) road map to follow. It's infinitely customisable and perfectly in line with your DEEPEST hopes and dreams. What can I use it for? Anything you'd like to change or achieve in your life. Your life dreams (big or small), your short or long-term goals, your mindset, your job or career, relationship growth, lif

Carolyn the Counsellor
Jun 4, 20193 min read
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So what actually happens in therapy...?
The first step has been taken, you've booked yourself in for counselling. You feel excited and possibly a bit nervous (eek!). Questions go through your head... "How can I talk about this stuff? Where do I even start? What if I cry?! And what actually happens in a counselling session?" You're here. It feels like a major step. Finally, you can offload the problem, situation, concern or dilemma that has been on your mind for days, weeks, maybe even years. It's taken time to feel

Carolyn the Counsellor
May 28, 20193 min read
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Becoming your own best friend...
It turns out she's not so bad after all, this beautiful woman in the mirror gazing back at you. In fact, she's starting to like HERSELF more and more... She's doubted herself in the past. Disliked what she saw. Taken on every mean comment as if it was the truth. Failed to trust her instincts. Believed the negative voices. Spoken to herself like she's her own worst enemy. But that was before. Happily, things have changed. She took time to look deep inside. She didn't realise

Carolyn the Counsellor
May 9, 20192 min read
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