Feeling stuck? Finding it hard to finish something or even get started? This blog is totally for you...
The reasons people procrastinate may surprise you. There's more to it, lurking beneath the "I don't have time" or "I'm just lazy". Deep down, it may be:
"I'm afraid of failing"
"I'm not good enough"
"I'm protecting myself from criticism"
"I can't risk being rejected or hurt"
"I'm scared it's not perfect"
"I'm afraid I will be ridiculed"
"My inner critic is advising against it"...
Sound familiar? We all feel this way from time to time, but if procrastination is ruling your world, there's never been a better time to learn some tools and tips.
1. Accept that something is always, always better than nothing
There's an awesome saying I love: "done is better than perfect".
The satisfaction and progress you make by finishing something can be worth even more than the finished product itself.
It's the feeling you get about your own competence, dependability and capability that then breeds further action and enables space for learning, developing and growing.
You can only grow by trying, giving it a go, putting it out there, falling down (sometimes) and carrying on. That is success. Build it and they will come, my friend.
2. Acknowledge that you can only succeed if you chip away at it and try your best
Doing five minutes of something towards your goal every day is going to get you there in most cases.
Trying your best means planning, focusing, brainstorming, moving and action.
It means putting one foot in front of the other. Regularly. In spite of all the reasons you can think of not to. Trying is effort. Effort brings opportunity and opportunity brings success.
3. Listen closely to your inner supporter
You've probably heard that voice before. It's quiet, but firmly encouraging. It belongs to your inner supporter.
It believes in you.
It never forgets the numerous times you've tried and succeeded. It forgives mistakes and reminds you that they're learning experiences. It knows you're human and imperfectly perfect like everyone else. (It's ok with that).
Allow your inner supportive voice to provide the impetus you need. Procrastination may have taken up space in your head for too long. It's time to tune in to self-compassion.
4. Remind yourself that things usually turn out ok
Ever noticed that when something's finally done and out there in the world, quite often NOTHING terrible happens?
Fear of failure can be crippling. But, on evidence, just how often do things go REALLY badly wrong for you? Is it truly a major catastrophe or more like a plain old speed hump?...
Think about your choices when it comes to feedback, opinions (and maybe judgement) by others and yourself - how can you maintain healthy perspective and best manage your own reactions to these inevitable things?
5. Chunk the task into baby steps
On a big sheet of blank paper, write or draw ALL the steps you'd need to undertake to get this thing done.
Everything sister.
Include every action needed from starting today right up to the finished outcome. Now add the priority order.
Break any BIGGER steps into smaller steps so that they're all bite-sized and achievable. Consider including possible threats to progress and map out some solutions ahead of time. Set time-frames, and hey presto!!! Plan DONE.
6. Identify whose opinion actually really matters
Everyone has an opinion on everything. Think about who in your world is actually qualified to provide useful feedback to you.
What would happen if you embraced helpful opinions (if needed) only from those who have genuine expertise, experience and empathy with regards to the topic?
Everyone else's opinion is most likely based on how they feel, rather than on what YOU'VE done. Therefore their input is unlikely to have merit. Consider embracing more sound sources of truth, including the very best, your OWN.
So, if you've been living on Procrastination Street (it's not just you, LOTS of people live there), today could be the day to change your address.
Make a start on that thing you've been thinking about, lean into your inner encourager, expect it to go well, plan the baby steps necessary to finish, get SOMETHING out there and throw the opinions of disbelievers in the bin. The BIN, lovely lady.
Do a few actions from your plan every day and intentionally celebrate each action and effort. You've totally got this. And I have a feeling that there's nothing you can't do.
Carolyn x
Counselling by Carolyn is a counselling practice located in Whittlesea, Victoria specialising in assisting men, women, children and families with emotions, thought patterns, problems, concerns, relationships and family dynamics.
Visit www.counsellingbycarolyn.webs.com to learn more or to place a booking.
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